Thing 39: If each decade of your life was represented by a pop song, what would they be?

And so it continues. Writing these has been a really interesting experience for me, and I'm a little upset that I don't have the motivation to continue doing so regularly. In any case, I'll do my best to make my writing interesting when I do get around to it.

speaking of which, we're on Thing 39, so the next story challenge is coming up! That means I'm looking for suggestions about what I should include. Feel free to leave a comment below with a few topics that you'd like to see included!

Thing 39: If each decade of your life was represented by a pop song, what would they be?

Well, that's a bit disappointing. I've only had 2.2 decades thus far. Furthermore, a lot can change in 10 years, so I don't think a period of that granularity is really an apt representation of the time therein. Rather than follow this verbatim, I'm going to express my life in stages of varying periods.

Note that the songs I choose will likely not be perfect. I've got a pretty decent library (a little over 9000 (nice.) songs on my computer) with a decent amount of variety, but finding a song that describes something so intricate and complex as a human life with any degree of accuracy is pretty much impossible.

In any case, I'll give it a shot.

-----------------------

So one day, I was born. It wasn't really that important an event in the grand scheme of things. Hell, I was the eighth child between my parents, and I'm told my birth was incredibly uneventful as births go. All in all, my birth means nothing.

But here I am.

So it didn't mean much, but it happened. What is important about this event is that it started my journey. Without it, I wouldn't be here today. All that I've known, felt, accomplished, would not exist. And I was not alone. I had my parents to guide me, to fill my empty head with ideas and sounds and hope.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life with the intro track from Aquaria's official soundtrack, written by Alex Holowka.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4g_k333NWM

...

So then I began to grow. I'm told I was a cute child, which I suppose is a matter of interpretation. Regardless, I did have an incredibly vivid imagination. This is a trait I'm particular proud of, and that I retain to this day. I dreamt big -- really big. I wanted to be an inventor, and start a bar in a double-decker bus. I wanted to be a powerful wizard and fight evil in Power World.

At this time I was still pretty innocent; just a naiive child learning all he could about the world around him. Reality didn't mean a whole lot back then.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life with Ellie Goulding's Starry Eyed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBf2v4mLM8k

...

So then the evil set in. I was a terrible, terrible child.

Now at this point you're probably chalking this up to "kids being kids" or some other such nonsense. To put it bluntly, you're wrong.

I was a terrible, terrible child.

This was not my parents' fault. They taught me well enough, and I had a loving home.

I was a terrible, terrible child.

First and foremost, I was angry at everything. Always. I portrayed this anger with yelling, and violence, and indignation. I can't remember a day when I didn't scream about something. I would throw my schoolbag around. I would yell and cry.

And there was no good reason.

I was a terrible, terrible child.

Secondly, I was entitled. I was pretty intelligent for a kid my age (or at least, I knew more than my peers at that stage), and by god did I ever milk that. I thought the world belonged to me, and I was PISSED when others disagreed. And I was selfish. Oh, was I ever selfish. I would fly into a fit of rage if somebody didn't stop whatever they were doing to cater to my whim.

I was a terrible, terrible child.

That phase lasted a long time. It's sort of like the dark age of my life thus far.

For this reason, I  would describe this  part of my life with a fairly obvious choice: Down With The Sickness, by Disturbed.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzxuknbQ5VY

...

So then I realised what a horrible person I was. I started making actual friends for a change, and I legitimately wanted to become better. In grades seven and eight I thought that one day, with a little work, I might actually become a decent human being.

I'm not sure what it was that made me open my eyes, but I knew I had to make a change. I couldn't help but be ashamed by what I'd left behind, but there was hope.

There was always hope.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life with Hot Chip's I Feel Better.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GOZjlwIwfk

And because the music video's a bit weird, he's the song on its own.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N-Y07r8n6W4

...

So then I got to high school, where two pretty important things happened.

First, I met a girl, and I became (unhealthily) obsessed with her for 4 years.

Second, I realised I was still the same conceited bastard I used to be, but with a bit of a better mask.

This realisation didn't really sink in until closer to my graduation, but despite my big talk I knew deep down that I wasn't doing all that I could. In fact, I wasn't doing much of anything. I did get straight A's in highschool (except for a 78 in grade 10 history), if I actually gave a damn I could have done significantly better. I wasn't involved in anything extracurricular, and when I made friends it was more of an accident than anything else. I seemed to think that because I was in IB I was better than everybody else. It hits you pretty hard when you realise just how wrong you are about something. (P.S. - I'm pretty sure grade 10 was the first time in my life that I ever said "I was wrong.")

I suppose you'll want to know more about the girl... There's not much to tell, really. I fell in lust with a girl who I found to be incredibly attractive, and I put her on an impossible pedestal. I thought she was perfect. The more I learned about her, the more I realised that she was anything but, and I began to hate myself. As terrible as I thought she was, I still saw myself as worse, and I sunk into a deep depression. I hated myself both for liking her so much (I called it love) and for not being good enough for her.

High school had some high points, but it was a very sad time for me.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life with Korn's Liar. There are a few reasons for this, but I'll let you figure those out on your own.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8H-JK5AdlXw

...

So then I started university. For a very short time, I was genuinely happy.

A very short time.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life with Tool's Intermission.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSvtGQUqldA

Alternatively, having turned over a bit of a new leaf, Hey Ocean!'s I Am A Heart may also be fitting.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oWlcImcS6A

...

So then reality hit. It wasn't long before UW began to jade me. I began to resent a lot of things, and the depression came creeping back.

The bittersweet edge of this depression was perspective. I'd lived a number of pretty powerful emotions up to now, and it left me with a very strong understanding of who I am and what needed to change. My strengths and my faults all became abundantly clear to me, and the path I needed to take was fairly well-lit.

The heart of the matter is that I am not happy with myself. I haven't been for a very long time.

But, I know I also have some redeeming qualities to counteract the not-so-redeeming ones. My goal is to cultivate those qualities, and one day became every bit of the man I know I should be; the man who lives the qualities I preach.

For this reason, I would describe this part of my life -- the most recent, heartwrenching chapter -- with Imagine Dragon's Demons. I can think of no better representation than this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NSoIWEGL1YM

So there you have it. This musical interlude isn't a particularly happy one, but at least it's honest.